feeling veri funi. like guai4 guai4 de. been tinking of 'gin' alot dese paz hours and realised dat im still veri sad. yea. haiz. i rem dat he used to put a smile on my lips simply by me hearing his voice. now, its not so simple. we seem to have nth to tok abt. he seems to be avoiding me. and kristy is so damn bluffing me. she said he was her bf now. and i was like wth. so faz got new gf le. was quite heartbroken and all. cried a little when i went offline. den went online again. saw him online. asked him whether its true. he said its lies. tink im supposed to feel happy. but all i felt was like juz plain resignation. maybe in the firz place he was juz playing. maybe he was lying all along. all his words seem to have big loopholes and i duno how to trust the reason he gave me. its like so self-contradicting. maybe im not supposed to fall. maybe hes not the one to catch my fall. maybe.. juz maybe.. i wished i knew fer sure how he felt. if hes reali playing could he pls tell me since the game's over. dun like being kept in suspense. tink dis is seriously preventing me frm tinking straight. haf all farni ideas now. maybe i shld go curl up in my bed and wail my heart out. yea rite. i can reali do dat with the hse still full of peeps. gees. going slp nows. sincerely hope im not gona dream abt him again. period.-
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